CHICAGO, IL — As Thanksgiving approaches, aunts across the nation are reportedly gearing up to make a casual yet deeply problematic comment at family dinner tables, sources confirmed Monday.

“It’s tradition,” said Aunt Linda, 58, while meticulously planning her annual contribution of cranberry sauce and cringe-inducing remarks. “I’ve been waiting all year to ‘accidentally’ refer to my neighbor in a way that gets everyone uncomfortably quiet for three full minutes.”

Experts say this yearly phenomenon occurs with startling consistency, as aunts with varying levels of tact prepare to insert a racially tinged comment, gender stereotype, or outdated term during Thanksgiving dinner. Many families now reportedly have “spotters” on standby to change the subject before the slur fully lands.

Despite mounting social pressure to modernize, aunts nationwide appear undeterred. Many have reportedly been rehearsing their one-liners in front of mirrors or slipping casually offensive phrases into texts to ensure they’re primed for delivery. Other Aunts even post slightly more progressive ideas on social media leading up to the event, in hopes to catch family members even more off-guard.

Meanwhile, families are strategizing countermeasures. Some are creating pre-planned conversational pivots (“Hey, did anyone see The Great British Bake Off?”), while others are simply opting for wine—lots of wine.

Sociologists note this annual event is not exclusive to aunts but often extends to uncles, grandparents, and that one cousin who “did their own research.” Still, aunts are credited as pioneers of the practice, given their uncanny ability to pair offensive language with a seemingly harmless question for the table.

When reached for comment, Aunt Linda shrugged. “It’s just who I am. Besides, if I didn’t do it, how would we all bond over eye rolls and regret?”

You may also like: