Local Party Goer Sits In Wet Chair First Thing
Local man Craig Dobbins made the rookie mistake of sitting in a visibly wet patio chair within 30 seconds of arriving at a neighborhood party last Saturday. Witnesses say the incident occurred just as the host cheerfully shouted, “Come on in! Make yourself at home!”—a suggestion Dobbins took far too literally.
2025 DESIGN TREND: Make Your Powder Room Fucking Nutso
In an age where minimalist aesthetics and calming neutrals have dominated the interior design world, a new trend is emerging to blow the doors off your beige sanctuary: making your powder room fucking nuts.
BREAKING: First Gathering In Living Room A Total Bust
In what many are calling “a dismal failure of spatial planning and social synergy,” the inaugural gathering in 32-year-old Jared Turman’s newly redesigned living room was declared a complete bust Thursday night.