Katy Perry's 'Lifetimes' Tour to Feature AI Holograms of Engaged Audience Members
LOS ANGELES, CA — Katy Perry announced that her upcoming Lifetimes tour will feature AI-generated holograms of excited audience members, ensuring an energetic atmosphere even if real attendees remain emotionally uninvested or non-existent. “We’re using cutting-edge technology to project enthusiastic fans into the arena,” Perry revealed in a press conference, where reporters noted she seemed slightly pixelated herself. “The AI will generate crowd reactions in real-time, so I never have to worry about a dead audience.”
The innovative system, dubbed KatyVision™, is designed to detect pockets of disengagement, vacant seats, and concertgoers scrolling through TikTok. Once detected, the AI seamlessly replaces them with dynamic, artificially enthusiastic projections. These hyper-realistic holograms will cheer, sing along, and pretend to know the deep cuts from Smile.
“I went to Taylor’s Eras tour, and it was like a religious experience,” said 23-year-old Kylie Montgomery, who attended Perry’s last Vegas residency. “I probably won’t be going to Katy’s ‘Lifetimes’ tour.
To heighten engagement, the system will also generate AI Boyfriends™ for lonely attendees, who will gaze adoringly at fans while mouthing, “You look so cute in this light.” Reports are even surfacing that some AI couples in the audience will be arguing about which exit to use to make the lonelier fans feel better about their AI match.
“We found that audience members struggle to match the energy required for an arena spectacle,” said Perry’s AI consultant, Dr. Logan Byrne. “So we thought, why not manufacture the ideal Katy Perry audience? The ones who scream ‘I LOVE YOU KATY’ at the perfect moment, hold up the correct lyric signs, and, most importantly, don’t film the entire show on their phones like they’re shooting The Blair Witch Project.”
Despite the excitement, some critics have expressed concerns over the implications of AI holograms replacing real human engagement. “It’s a slippery slope,” said live music expert Deidre Holt. “Today, it’s AI fans. Tomorrow, it’s AI performers. Next thing you know, we’re paying to watch an algorithm sing Firework while Katy Perry enjoys a spa day.”
Perry, however, remains unfazed. “Honestly, if I can just perform to a stadium full of holograms who adore me, that’s ideal. Less sweat, more love,” she said.
Tickets for the Lifetimes tour go on sale next week, with premium packages offering the chance to upgrade your hologram’s enthusiasm level for an additional $99.99.
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