REPORT: New Jersey Still Shithole
Despite years of federal funding, urban renewal projects, and the desperate prayers of its citizens, a new report confirms what Americans have long suspected: New Jersey is still a complete shithole. The study, conducted by the Institute for Urban Realities, found that New Jersey has maintained its title as the nation’s sand dumpster, citing a potent combination of oppressive taxation, rampant crime, and an overall aesthetic best described as “New York’s unflushed toilet.”
SMUG AIRLINE ELITE LOOKS DOWN ON HARDWORKING AMERICANS FROM COMFORT PLUS
Folks, we have yet another example of America’s elites rubbing their privilege in the faces of real, hardworking travelers. Meet Jeff Lancaster: a so-called “Comfort Plus” passenger who loves watching everyday Americans trudge past him to the cramped back rows, all while enjoying his extra two inches of legroom like some kind of airport aristocrat.
TRAVEL REVIEW: Kyoto, Japan? I Don’t Know, Man.
Kyoto, Japan. A place so steeped in history that it feels like it should come with a warning: “May cause accidental learning.” Who can be assed to do school work when you’re trying to have a holiday? I spent three days there, walking amongst temples, shrines, and people who seemed to understand what they were doing. I, however, did not.
2025 Projected to Be Worst Year on Record for Airplane Seat-to-Booty Size Ratios
A report from the International Airline Comfort Association (IACA) has revealed that 2025 is on track to see an unprecedented mismatch between airplane seat dimensions and average booty size, sparking fears of widespread discomfort and cabin chaos.
TRAVEL REVIEW: I wouldn’t say “Great” Lakes
After a week spent touring the so-called "Great" Lakes, I feel compelled to ask: Are we sure about the name? Because, having seen them firsthand, I’d argue the term “great” might be overselling it.